No One Will Hear Me, Not Even The Chair

OK, here's how my Weekend of Surrealism is shaking out.

• Friday: Back in December, when Stella and I and her hip babysitter Talia went to take in the Nutcracker at the Milwaukee Ballet, we got some news that blew us away. Artistic Director Michael Pink stepped on stage to introduce the evening, and to plug upcoming events. I almost wasn't listening because I already have season tickets to the ballet, but then the words "William Shatner…." crept into my ears, as Pink told us all that music from Shatner's collaboration with Ben Folds, "Has Been" was going to be used for Margo Sappington's latest creation. Stella, who doesn't know the significance of "Denny Crane!" (much less "Beam us up") was decidedly embarassed, as Talia and I did our best to contain our thrill and not freak out all the normal people sitting by us. "Ah, but I'm sure they won't be using the Shatner/Henry Rollins duet." Oh yes they will! I later learned. Anyway, our tickets are fro Friday night, we'll have a wonderful seat in the loge, and I still cannot contain myself: William Shatner, Henry Rollins, and the delicious eye candy that is the Milwaukee Ballet all in one night! This is something out of those dreams I get when I eat too much Indian food. And what a gift to Stella, who will be able to tell some attractively geeky guy in college that she wants to impress, "When I was 8 years old, my mom took me to see the ballet with music by William Shatner, Ben Folds, Joe Jackson and Henry Rollins including a Pulp cover!" Does this get me back on the nomination list for Mother of the Year or what?


• Saturday: My love for William Shatner is at least equaled by Dan "Myles" Mullen's love for Neil Diamond. I loved William Shatner long before it was hip to love William Shatner; Mullen's love for Neil Diamond is pure, since it has never been, and probably never will be, hip to love Neil Diamond. We've even done "I Am I Said" in our band together, yes, we deconstruct it, but Mullen's sincere take on it keeps it from being too jaded. And both our love for Shatner and Diamond is indeed overshadowed by Mark Shurilla's love for Buddy Holly. Every year, Shurilla assembles a band, "The Buddy Holly Review" and plays a tribute to that last Winter Dance Party, and if he doesn't look and sound exactly like the man from Lubbock, his aim is true. I still don't know if "Review" is purposely misspelled for "Revue" or not: is this an academic review of the man's musical impact, or a rave-up revue of Holly's hits? Anyway, this year's review/revue will be Saturday at the Clarion Hotel, right across the airport. Now for the surreal twist:
  
  Claire Sardina, better known as "Thunder" will be sitting in with them at the Clairon Hotel Saturday night. That's "Thunder", as in "Thunder and Lightning," the local Neil Diamond tribute band, who tragically lost "Lightning" (Sardina's husband, Michael) to complications from a freak head injury last summer. I will be there, with both silver gelatin celluloid and digital, to capture this in all its glory. I might have to go see the Bugs at Club Lulu afterwards to come down from this. I have no idea if/how Myles is going to recover.


• Sunday: Local psychedelia curmudgeon Lars Kvam is doing his "Last record spin at the Circle A." He's one in a long line of people promoting their next show at the Circle A as their "Last Show at the Circle A" since the place will be closing down. Any time you spend more than 10 minutes with Lars Kvam, its surreal. I mean that in a most complementary way.